If you aren't making it all about you, why would you make a comment like "everything I do is wrong"- the kind of comment that is always code, when white people like us say if for "they're making a big deal over nothing and quite frankly, they're just picking on me"?

it's not that hard...just listen to what BIPOC people are saying and do what they ask. They aren't asking anything of any white person that is an intolerable burden.